Shaped By Grace: November 2011

“Being single does not mean that you are incomplete.”
I wish I remember who said this, because when they did it hit me like a ton of bricks. I have always been slightly ~~disgusted~~ perturbed when I hear people saying that the other person “completes them” or they “can’t live without” the other. You might not WANT to live without them, but I PROMISE you can!

Okay, this is an exception! Ha

Anyways, I never thought that my mentality was that I was waiting on someone else to complete me. I did notice though, that at this stage in life the pressure for finding that person you will marry is RiDiCuLoUs! The norm is that you graduate college with a husband and if you don’t then there is something wrong with you, right? WRONG! This idea of society played into my thought process, and made not settling very hard during my single years.

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On November 2nd, I celebrated my two year anniversary of singleness. Yes, I do mean celebrated. First off, I don’t have that date marked in my calendar or anything. It just happened on a significant date, so I remember it. Ha. Secondly, the reason I celebrated was because I have learned more about myself and about what a healthy relationship is in those two years than I have in my entire life! Was it easy at all times? No! Sometimes ~~okay a LOT~~ I was tired of being the third/fifth wheel. I was tired of not being able to share those special things with someone. Also, being corrected is not easy, and it is not fun. I’m thankful that my Father is loving and gentle, and in light of that, loved me too much to keep me where I was. I could write a book on all of the things that I have learned in these past two years. True story. It has not been easy, but I KNOW that it will be worth it. I will not look back and think, “Man, I should have settled for that guy I know would have treated me with zero respect”. I could fill in the blank with many other things as well. I just know it’s worth it.

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It hurts my heart when I see beautiful, wonderful girls settling for guys that just do NOT cut it, simply because they are tired of being single or they feel that they can’t do better. Satan is the father of lies, and I promise that one will be thrown out there. There is a tremendous lack of real men in this world, but sometimes we invite them to act as they do because we ALLOW them to treat us as they do. Ladies, I beg you not to settle! You should have a man that adores you, treasures you, and treats you with respect! You should have a LEADER of a man! You are not called to be the leader, woman. P.S. this is not only for single women. It also applies to guys (obviously altered) and to women already in relationships.

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So, in light of this conversation, I want you to watch this 38 second video. It is HILARIOUS, and I crack up every single time I watch it. ~~(Which has been an awful lot)~~

Hilarious!

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I promise I do not speak as if I’ve got it all together and/or know it all. These are words from experience and struggle. These are lessons learned.

Shaped by Grace,

Jessica Nicole

It’s time for a little light hearted confession again. I enjoy laughing at myself.

(1) When I was younger I was so upset that I had green eyes, because that meant no one could sing “Brown Eyed Girl” to me.

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(2) I thought the song “Moves Like Jagger” said “I've got to move my dragon”. As I was singing it in the car with my twin, he very readily corrected me. I then said, “The weatherman?!? Why do we want to move like him?” *We have a local weatherman named Jim Jagger. Shameful, but I can laugh at myself. Ha

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(3) When I don’t feel good, I revert back to childlike tendencies. Most people want to be left alone and not touched. I want to be cuddled and comforted like a baby. Ha! I’m pretty sure Amber Marie knows me better than anyone in the world. So, when she walked in yesterday and I was on the couch ~~crying, holding my teddy bear~~ she immediately came over, hugged me, cuddled me, made me hot tea, and strongly encouraged me to get in the bed. I didn’t think she was coming home, so I was SUPER excited when she came in!